


At What Cost?

by StoryTimeTheCreed



Category: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other, Yusuf needs some love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:54:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23381266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StoryTimeTheCreed/pseuds/StoryTimeTheCreed
Summary: The things we take for granted for the things we've always wanted. We get distracted, it happens, but at what cost?
Relationships: Ezio Auditore da Firenze/Sofia Sartor, Ezio Auditore da Firenze/Yusuf Tazim, Yusuf Tazim/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 12





	At What Cost?

Arriving home that night, bodies sore from climbing and fighting, Zara wished for nothing more than to rest. Yusuf, however, had other ideas. “Where are you off to?” Winding his arms around her, Yusuf pulled her close and buried his face at her neck. Peppering kisses there and making her squeal, he laughed and continued the process.

“I’m going to bed.” She fought through the laughter.

“Hm.” Yusuf’s laughter rumbled from his chest. “That sounds like a wonderful idea.”

Her giggling intensified as Yusuf lifted her and carried her bridal style to their room. “Yusuf! You know this isn’t what I meant.” Though her words were protests, her fingers tangled in his hair and discarded of his headband. Dark brown tangles curled at his forehead and Yusuf crinkled his nose.

“Hey!” He playfully made her for face, nipping at her cheeks and chin. “Do we have a thief?” Gently lowering her to their bed, Yusuf laid by her side and ran his thumb over her cheek. They hadn’t spent much time together since Ezio came into town. Zara didn’t mind at first. Yusuf was very taken by the man, idolized him, and came home giddy when Ezio called him brother.

Then came the late nights. The early mornings. Soon, he was not coming home at all.

She forgave this because as Yusuf lay next to her, his touch warming her skin, none of that mattered. They were back as they were. Together. “Tell me, my moon.” His eyes searched hers. “Hungry?”

Grinning madly, mouth already watering, Zara kept her cool. Absently staring at the ceiling as she thought. “I suppose.”

“I’m cooking.” Yusuf offered and she was sold. Yusuf traced his fingers over her cheek and lips. “Get comfortable. I’ll be right back.”

“No.” She protested. “Let me help you.”

Yusuf silenced her with a kiss and then gave her a stern look. One she couldn’t take seriously with his curls acting out. Pointing a finger at her nose, he gave it a press. “Please. I insist. It’s me making up for not being with you like I should.”

“Yusuf” He kissed her again, and she laughed. “Yusuf!” Again. “Fine!” She finally made out, and Yusuf nodded contently.

She must’ve fallen asleep at some point because she was awoken by a gentle shaking of her shoulder. “What’s wrong, my sun beam?” She croaked, half lidded and looking around the room for trouble in a sleepy daze. “’What’s going on?” Yusuf crouched to eye level. Taking one look at his face, Zara groaned and rolled over. “Ezio.”

“My moon, it’ll be quick.” Yusuf whispered, attempting to kiss her forehead but she’d buried it in the pillows. Sighing deeply, he settled for the back of her head. “I’m so sorry.”

“Just go, Yusuf.” She mumbled. “The sooner you’re gone, the sooner you’re back.” She said the words, but didn’t believe them.

Yusuf remained where he was, in his crouch. “The food is in the kitchen. Would you like me to bring it in?”

“I’ll get it.” She mumbled. He sighed once more and left the room. She wasn’t hungry anymore.

When Zara awoke, she ate last night’s dinner and headed to the Bureau. The Assassins there greeted her warmly and she warmed up for the day. At least, she was until another Assassin came in. “Morning, Zara.”

“Morning Mustafa.” Zara extended to grab the man’s forearm and they shook. However, Mustafa’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Is something wrong?”

“I was hoping Yusuf would be with you.”

Zara cocked her head. “I thought he was here with you.”

There was a moment of silence as she glared at the books at the table. Mustafa shifted uncomfortably and offered, “He must be with Master Ezio.”

Must be, Zara thought angrily. She couldn’t control her face, but she would control her tone. “What did you need him for?”

“Don’t worry yourself, Master Zara.”

“Mustafa.” Her caution betrayed her irritated tone. Yusuf was neglecting his responsibilities to their brothers, but she wouldn’t. “Tell me.”

“Training exercises.” He quickly put his hands up. “You don’t have to trouble yourself, Master. I can handle it by myself.”

“Mustafa, if we’re going to train novices correctly, it has to be two. You know this.” Zara glanced over her maps and books. “I’ll run my missions afterwards.”

“I’ll help you run them.”

Zara finally allowed herself a smile. “That sounds like a good plan.”

After training, Mustafa kept to his word and helped her run her missions. Unfortunately, had she begun them earlier, they would’ve stopped the Templars from completing theirs. “There’s always tomorrow.” Mustafa tried calming her as they entered the Bureau. “Our target is in town for three more days.”

“They were at their most vulnerable today, Mustafa.” Zara growled. Hunger, exhaustion, and a lost hunt weighed her nerves; and Yusuf was still nowhere to be found! She’d been waiting a month for this kill, and now her plans had changed.

“Cousin.” Mustafa took her shoulder and made her face him. “We’ll adapt. We always do.”

“That’s not the point, Mustafa!” Zara snapped. From where they were standing, they could spy their rooftop entrance. The setting sun cast Istanbul aflame with hues of gold, but Zara couldn’t appreciate it. “I should’ve talked to him about it before, but I never thought he’d be this irresponsible.”

“Zara-“

“Not coming home? That’s fine. Asking for help running his missions? How can I say no?” Tears pricked at her eyes, and Mustafa took her into his arms.

“It’s ok, Zara.”

“No it’s not! He should’ve been here instead of running around doing another’s work! I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing, I don’t know when he’ll be home, and I…I…. I’m so disappointed, Mustafa. I’m so disappointed.” Zara cried, and Mustafa just held her. There was nothing he could say.

When she arrived that night, Yusuf hadn’t returned. In fact, he wouldn’t arrive until the following night. After another day of double work, she returned home with her only thought being bed. Zara opened the door, and found Yusuf in the living room. Surprise more than excitement made her call his name, and at the sound, he turned.

“My moon! Just wait until I tell you what Ezio and I did. You’re going to love it.” As he crossed the room, she put her hand up. Yusuf froze, staring at her hand in confusion. “Is something wrong?”

“Is somet-“ Zara blinked and shook her head. “Where the hell were you!?”

Now Yusuf looked confused, “I was with Ezio.”

“For two days?” The tears she’d cried opened her up to the anger inside.

“Has it been that long?” Yusuf scratched his beard. “Zara, I’m sorry.” Yusuf ducked his head to try to catch her eyes, and he waited. Taking a deep breath, she lowered her hand and he slowly crossed over to her. Tenderly, he grazed his fingers along her crossed arms, resting his hands on her elbows, and kept himself at elbow’s length. “Zara, you know I would never do anything to upset you on purpose.” Yusuf dropped his voice. His whole world was in his hands. “I am so sorry. How can I make this better?”

“It’s not just me, Yusuf.” She finally said, taking his hands and playing with them as she spoke. Casting small glances up, she mainly stared at his chest. Memorizing his collarbones and the chest hair curling there. His skin was tan and she’d always thought touching him felt like touching the sun. Warm and beautiful. “The Brotherhood, our brothers, you let them down.”

Yusuf hissed, and he hung his head back to stare at the ceiling. “Zara, I completely forgot. I was supposed to teach the novices yesterday with Mustafa.”

“Don’t worry, I took care of it.” She said and when he returned his look to her, Yusuf looked thoroughly upset.

“Thank you. I… I don’t deserve you. All the help you’ve given to allow me the run around with Ezio.”

“I’m not upset you’re running missions with him, I’m more upset that you’re letting your responsibilities here slip.” Getting that all off her chest, Zara felt better. “But going forward, I would like us to communicate more. Yusuf, I get very worried when I don’t know where you are. I know you’re more than capable, but I’d just like to know.”

Yusuf sucked on his lip, looking ashamed. “I can’t.”

“I’m sorry?” Zara looked up, confused at what she’d heard.

Yusuf bit his bottom lip as he worked out his words, but Zara was already wiggling out of his arms. “Zara, please.” He breathed, unsure what else to say. “It’s someone else’s mission. I promised him I wouldn’t say anything.”

Zara shook her head, heading for the door. “And you promised me that you’d be here. For them.” She threw her hand to the east to indicate the Bureau. “And for me.” Yusuf took a step, but she just turned away. “I… I can’t do this, Yusuf.”

“Zara.” His skin flushed and his eyes grew watery. They truly looked like the sea now. “What are you saying? Just for the night or…”

“I don’t know Yusuf, but I’m tried.” Zara confessed. “I’m tried of being disappointed.” She walked out the door and Yusuf went after her.

“Zara, please.” He begged. “Come back inside. Can we talk about this?”

Zara spun around. “Yusuf, I love you. I do.” She grabbed his hands looked him in the eye. “But I’m tried of talking. I need some air.” Holding his hands, she took in their feel. They were smooth save for the callasses at his fingers from years of climbing. They always made her feel safe. Zara gave them one final kiss before turning on her heel. “Just give me time, Yusuf. Please.”

He didn’t follow her.

Two days later, at Mustafa’s family home, Zara headed out into the night. A break from Yusuf, from training, and from the Brotherhood was much needed, and she felt her mind was clearer. Heading towards the Bureau to grab some books before heading home, she ran into Damien. Damien, tan with black hair cut short and a smile that fell the most vulnerable of each sex, cast that smile on her. “Zara!” He exclaimed, following her inside. “What are you doing on night duty? I thought you and Yusuf enjoyed the morning route.”

“Damien, you know Yusuf and I go both ways.” She winked before making her way upstairs. Damien chuckled, and helped her gather her things.

“Are you sure you don’t need help getting this home?” Damien offered his bag, and Zara thought it a moment. She’d left hers at home. Extending a hand, Zara watched Damien organize her books inside. “You’re being very sweet today. What do you want, Damien?”

“Am I that easy to read?” He scoffed, but there was an unease to it. He gave her the bag. “I must be a terrible Assassin.”

“Damien,” She secured it around her. “You know you’re one of our best. What’s going on?”

Damien looked over his shoulder and drew closer. “It’s, uh, it’s a matter of the heart.”

“Damien!” Zara hissed, drawing nearer. “That’s great news!” She whispered.

“Yea, if I could talk to them.” Damien frowned. “Every time I try, I mix up my words or act strangely. This never happens when I’m searching for lovers. Why is this happening now? Am I… am I losing my charm?”

Zara hid her chuckle but taking a deep breath. “Well, matters of the heart are most intense, that’s why people act so differently on them. The next time you see this person, just be yourself. Relax. You’re a great person, Damien. They’ll love you.”

“You think so?” He’d turned over so he was covering her. “It’s….it’s a civilian.”

“So?”

“I want to keep…him safe.” He flickered his eyes to hers, waiting for a reaction.

Zara shrugged, “That’s a noble task, but you also have to think about yourself. This life, especially when you’re an Assassin, doesn’t give us many happy moments. We have to make those ourselves.” She pulled him into a hug and Damien held her tight. “Go be happy, Damien. With whomever. You know Yusuf and I look forward to meeting him.

“Thanks, Zara.” Damien smiled, and moved away from her. He leaned against the window and tried to maintain his cool aura. Zara could only laugh. Damien cast his gaze outside and he cocked his head. “Zara?” He called, “Is Yusuf ok?”

Her heart dropped, “Why wouldn’t he be?”

Damien beckoned her to the window, and she peered out to find Yusuf wistfully gazing up at them in the light of the full moon. It paled him, but she could see the frown. The tears shimmering down his cheeks and into his beard.

“Is he well?” Damien asked, and Zara took off the bag.

“He should be. Let me check.” Running down the stairs, she was quickly outside, but Yusuf was nowhere to be seen. “Khadija!” Zara called when she spied the Assassin. “Do you know where Yusuf went?”

Khadija pointed towards the center of town. “Master Ezio had a mission for him, I believe. Something about protecting a bookstore?” Khadija adjusted her hijab and glanced up at Damien. He waved back down. “It’s funny.” She said, “Had I not known you two, I would’ve thought you were kissing up there.”

“Really?” Zara’s jaw dropped. That’s what it must have looked like to Yusuf! “Khadija, do you remember the store?”

By the light of the full moon, Zara found her way to the bookstore. By the screaming, she was able to find the fight. Upon entering the store, she found overturned tables and books littering the ground. The papers made her feet slip and slide as she hurried to the fight.

The main room was large and sank into the ground. Three stairs would bring her into the fray. A woman was held by two men on the other side of the room, and the other five were fighting Yusuf. One kicked, catching his knee. Yusuf’s knee hit the ground, and he stabbed up and into his next attacker’s jaw. The body fell to the ground with a thud, and the others sprang.

As did she.

Leaping, she landed on one man and silenced the other two with hidden blades to the back of the neck. Yusuf wheeled around and stabbing the man she’d landed on just as she threw two knives at the ones holding the woman. The thuds were hidden by the scream of the woman. She threw her hands over her ears as she did so. The men fell.

The last rings of the scream echoed in their ears as Zara grabbed Yusuf’s forearm and helped him up. Before he could speak, Zara was heading towards the woman with her hands up. “Are you injured?”

“Is it over?” The woman asked, looking down at the bodies at her feet and shivering. Zara had reached her and offered a hand.

“Don’t look at them.” She said softly. “My name is Zara. This is Yusuf.”

“You’re Ezio’s friends.” The woman closed her eyes as Zara helped her over the bodies.

“Yes.” Zara looked at the door. “We’re taking you somewhere safe. Somewhere we’ll be able to take a good look at you. Is that ok?”

They were almost to the main door. “My books.” The woman sobbed. “My books.”

“I’m sorry. We’ll help clean this place up afterwards. Is that ok?”

She nodded and they walked into the street. The woman started shivering, so Zara held her close and rubbed her shoulders. Shock, not cold, touched this woman. Yusuf had taken point.

When they arrived at the Bureau, Zara stayed with the woman. Sofia was her name. They talked about books until the sun rose.

Yusuf kept his distance during this time, and all the better. Zara felt they’d have their talk at a more appropriate time. By the second night, Sofia and Zara had become quick friends and Yusuf excused himself to keep watch.

With Sofia sleeping beside her, Zara leaned against the wall, watching the night sky get replaced by the soft pinks of sunrise.

Tapping gently on the door, Yusuf ducked his head through the door. Smiling softly at the scene, his eyes landed gently on Zara before straightening and keeping his emotions from his face. “Um, Ezio,” he jut his thumb over his shoulder. “Is downstairs. He’d like to make sure Sofia’s ok, but I can just tell him…” His eyes landed on Sofia and he sighed. The skin under his eyes were dark, and his hair was hastily tied back with his scarf.

“I can wake her.” Zara tried to keep Yusuf’s eyes, but he wouldn’t look at her. “Yusuf, that night with Damien…”

Yusuf ran a hand through his hair, still not looking at her. “Zara, please. Can we discuss this later?”

“Yusuf…”

“I’ll tell Ezio she’s resting. The adventure she’s had, he’ll understand.” Yusuf closed the door on the way out, and Zara didn’t get much sleep after that.

Sofia awoke around the afternoon and grew embarrassed for having used Zara as a pillow. Zara assuring her it was fine. She helped Sofia downstairs and it was sweet to see her reunion with Ezio. 

He began profusely apologizing while she threw her arms around him and told him she’d been worried. Yusuf and Zara watched from the sidelines until she slipped her hand into his and gently tugged him into another room.

Still as could be, Yusuf said nothing until the door closed. “Nothing happened with Damien, Yusuf. I didn’t want you to think something had.”

“Zara, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Yusuf pouted, and Zara smiled.

“I do. I don’t want you to think we had that fight and I’m off trying to replace you.” 

At the word, Yusuf shifted uncomfortablely. Wrapping his arms around himself. “You…you didn’t want to replace me?” His eyes finally went to hers. “For someone more consistent? Who doesn’t anger you as I do? Someone who isn’t a fool?” Zara opened her mouth, but didn’t know what to say. Needing to busy his hands, Yusuf ripped off his scarf and folded it nicely before gathering his hair together and tying it back. Firmly, frustrated that he’d let her down, sleep deprived, and angry, Yusuf continued. “Because that’s what I was doing, Zara. I got so excited to run missions with Ezio that I completely let it overtake my life. Let it overtake our life. I shouldn’t have done it and I’m so sorry.” Yusuf extended a hand. “Not only that! You told me what was bothering you, and I put someone else before you. How can I say I love you when I did that?” His hands waved wildly as he spoke, struggling to keep his voice down. “And then, I did it again! I went on this mission at nearly the cost of Sofia! Had you not jumped in, I don’t think I would’ve survived. What is wrong with me, Zara? What if you weren’t there? You wouldn’t know what happened to me. What if we had children I needed to return home to?” Yusuf growled, closing his eyes and rubbing the bridge of his nose. Finally controlling his breathing, Yusuf said, “I’m asking for forgiveness and I understand that it may take time, but I’d love to have you by my side as I redeem myself. I am so sorry for being an irrational, star struck, immature fool. I promise, I give you my word, that I will never do that again.”

Hiw words hung in the air and settled like lead. As she gazed at him, the anger was still there, but so was the love. “I was upset because I was worried about what could have happened to you. I was angry that I lost my target and that you were putting Ezio before me. Yusuf, I’m still upset.” He nodded, keeping their eyes locked. “But I also still love you. I will always love you. I just ask that you put my needs into consideration too. I should have spoken to you about what was bothering me as soon as it happened, instead of keeping it inside and hoping it would pass. I also shouldn’t have lost my temper like that.” Slowly, she drew to him. As if their bodies had all control, Yusuf opened his arms and she buried herself in him. 

Leaning against his chest, she could hear his heart thudding. Sighing deeply, she rose to the tips of her toes and kissing his jaw. Closing his eyes, Yusuf hummed. Tears silently ran down his cheeks. “Yusuf.” Zara pulled away, wiping his tears in a panic. “Why…?” 

Kissing her frantic, tear stained hand, Yusuf finally opened his glittering eyes. “Zara, I almost lost the most important thing in my life. I’m terrified.”

Not knowing what else to say, Zara thought quickly. Smirking, she said, “Bet I could hold the whole world in my hands.”

Confused, Yusuf frowned. “Zara, that’s impossible.” Cupping his face, Zara smiled. As realization dawned, Yusuf turned pink. His body melted, and his smile was dream-like. His lips brushed against hers. “My moon, I have a reputation to uphold.” 

“I love you.” 

Yusuf rested his forehead on hers, and declared, “I love you too.” They stayed like that, enjoying each other’s warmth, neither wanting to break contact.

Their lips continued to brush, the other watching the other, judging who would go for the contact their hearts pined for. Raising to press herself against him, Zara pushed Yusuf into the wall. His arms remained at her waist, holding her tightly until her fingers tangled in his hair and he gasped, “Your touch drives me mad.” His voice was raspy. “I’ve missed it.”

“It’s only been a few days, Yusuf.” She giggled, and he kissed her deeply causing her to throw her head back and laugh. Catching herself, she bit her lips as Yusuf kissed her neck journeyed down to her throat. The puffs of breath and his shaking body telling her he was laughing too. 

“Far too long!” He nuzzled against her skin and lifted her.

“Yusuf, people are in the other room.” She wrapped her legs around his waist and rested her crossed hands behind his neck. For a second, Yusuf looked concerned. Frightened that he’d pushed a boundary so soon after their fight. Until Zara smiled and eyed the table. “So, you’ll have to be quiet.”

“Anything for you, my moon.” Yusuf carried her over to the table, pushing off the papers that littered there.


End file.
